oh to be empty

I would like to be empty of:
1. vague and nameless anxieties

So, I'm practicing awareness and presence. When I get those wobbly feelings, I notice them. It does seem to dissipate simply by observation. Then I get to say whether I want to hang onto them or not. And since I don't, I don't.

Well, that's the idea anyway. It does work, when I remember to do it. So I am feeling emptier.

among the many satisfying things

satisfying things in my world today:
1. a decent run for an old lady with arthritis
2. beer after run
3. the meeting ended
4. reading a good email from a friend describing how she spent her birthday beautifully
5. seeing an old friend and being reminded of a beautiful place and time

These are some of the things that keep the strangely persistent sense of gloom at bay. What on earth is that thing, anyway? It's like I can't see the forest for the trees right now or something. But these are good trees, so that is some consolation and I appreciate it.

According to buddhism we are both awakening and ignorance, not necessarily in equal measure but they do seem to slosh around together inside me in varying mixtures. Satisfaction for me has something to do with getting that mix to be lean enough to run smoothly. Clearer, cleaner mindfulness with less ignorance. In each moment, I adjust as I am able.

so I rambling into Saturday night...